CHAPTER 14

LECTURE EXTENSION

Changes in Romantic Partners' Perceptions of Love, Commitment, and Satisfaction Over Time

A study by Sprecher (1999) examined changes over a 4-year period in partners' perceptions of love, commitment, and satisfaction in romantic relationships. Couples who remained intact during the course of the research, as well as those who experienced a breakup, were studied. Also of interest was the extent to which couples' perceptions of love, commitment, and satisfaction were related to their experiences of future love and other related feelings. Five times over a 4-year period, heterosexual couples completed self-report questionnaires about their relationships. On each questionnaire, the participants completed scales of love, commitment, and satisfaction, and reported how these feelings had changed since the last questionnaire they had completed.

The results showed that both men and women in intact romantic relationships perceive their love, commitment, and satisfaction toward their partner as increasing year after year. However, although couples perceived that their positive feelings were growing each year, their scores on contemporaneous measures of love, commitment, and satisfaction generally did not increase over time. The exception was that in the most stable couples (that is, those who stayed together throughout the study), there was an overall increase in positive feelings, particularly commitment. In spite of the fact that the participants' scores on contemporaneous scales of love, commitment, and satisfaction did not generally increase over time, those who perceived greater change also exhibited relatively greater actual change. The participants who loved more at one time were also more likely to show love more at a later time, but the perception of an increase in love at one time was not related to the degree of love experienced at a subsequent time.

This investigation also provided interesting findings about the feelings involved in a breakup. Most of the participants who experienced a breakup during the study completed one additional questionnaire that included probes about changes in their love, commitment, and satisfaction before the breakup. These couples reported that their commitment and satisfaction, but not their love, had decreased before the breakup. The author notes that for some individuals, however, the reported decrease in positive feelings prior to the breakup may simply reflect attempts to make sense of the breakup. Nonetheless, these results suggest that people do not end their relationships because they fall out of love, but because of a growing dissatisfaction or unhappiness, which may then cause feelings of love to dissolve.

Sprecher, S. (1999). "I love you more today than yesterday": Romantic partners' perceptions of changes in love and related affect over time. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 76, 46-53

LEARNING ACTIVITY

Examining Popular Books on Parenting

Send students to the public library or bookstores to examine the variety of popular books on parenting. To guide their visit to the bookshelves, suggest that they try to answer some of the following questions: What topics are available? Are books available on special topics such as divorce, parenting children with special needs, or selecting quality child care? Are the books reader-friendly? Are the books well documented? What are the credentials of the authors? What topics are covered in infancy and toddlerhood, early childhood, middle childhood, and adolescence? Are books available on the topic of parenting adult children?

A related project would be to have the students select and read a popular book or chapter in a popular book on parenting. The students then could compare and contrast information in the book to information learned in this course.