Conflict is a part of most every interpersonal relationship. Managing conflict, then, is important if the relationship is to be long-lasting and rewarding. Learn how to manage conflict in your relationships and then complete the activity.
| Defining Conflict | Conflict has been defined as "an expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference from the other party in achieving their goals"21. Important concepts in this definition include "expressed struggle," which means the two sides must communicate about the problem for there to be conflict. Another important idea is that conflict often involves perceptions. The two sides may only perceive that their goals, resources, and interference is incompatible with each other's. |
| Common Problems in Conflict Management | Researchers have identified several problems that typically arise in conflict situations22. First, the parties will simply avoid the conflict. This can be damaging, because it can lead to greater problems in the future. It is usually best that the individuals discuss their differences. Second, individuals involved in conflict may blame the other individual. Often, individuals go beyond the specific behavior in question and blame the character of the person. When people use words such as, "He's such a slob," they are engaging in blame the other behavior. A final problem that is often encountered in conflict management is adopting a win-lose mentality. Focusing on each individual's goals/outcomes will help avoid using a win-lose strategy. |
| Defensive climate |
The climate in which conflict is managed is important. Dyads should avoid a defensive climate, which is characterized by these qualities:
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| Supportive Climate |
Instead, individuals should foster a supportive climate, marked by these traits:
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| Additional Tips |
A few final tips23 can help insure that conflict is successfully managed:
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