KnowYourself

KnowYourself Self-Assessment
Sexuality

Communication for Couples: Skills Inventory

Directions

Indicate how often you use the following skills when communicating with an intimate partner by circling the number in the appropriate column:

Never	Sometimes	Always
0	1	2	Ask open-ended questions
0	1	2	Ask focused questions that aren't too broad
0	1	2	Ask for additional details, examples, impressions
0	1	2	Give feedback (e.g., praise, paraphrasing, perception-checking, describing behavior, and "I-messages")
0	1	2	Paraphrase (e.g., restating the original statement in more specific terms, using an example, or restating it in more general terms)
0	1	2	Check perceptions (Perception checking is an effort to understand the feelings behind the words.)
0	1	2	Describe behavior (Useful behavior description, reports specific, observable actions without value judgments, and without making accusations or generalizations about motives, attitudes, or personality traits.)
0	1	2	Request behavior change using "I"-messages
0	1	2	Body orientation. (e.g., face the person when interacting.)
0	1	2	Remove barriers and distractions (e.g., phones ringing)
0	1	2	Observe facial expressions
0	1	2	Use frequent eye contact
0	1	2	Give praise when appropriate
0	1	2	Use humor appropriately.
			TOTAL

Scoring

Add up the circled numbers for a Total Score. A score of 28 points indicates that you are engaging in very effective communication for couples. A score of less than 14 indicates that you need to improve your communication skills.

Source

ED390114 Jan 96 Communication Skills. ERIC Digest, Number 102.
Author: Irmsher, Karen ERIC Clearinghouse on Educational Management, Eugene, Oreg.

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Judith A. Baker

KnowYourself

Self-Assessment

Sexuality

Communication for Couples: Skills Inventory

Directions

Scoring

Source